TUNNEY-SIDE-OF-THE-STREET

#95 October 23 2006
Welcome to this week's message from the Tunney-Side-Of-The-Street. You are encouraged to share this with fellow workers, family and friends.

After further review -

TRASH TALK! Where and when did that start? My Dad cautioned me about talking to opponents during the game. The concern was that talking would lose focus on your purpose -which is to win the game. Coach Herman Edwards of the Kansas City Chiefs says in my book, It's the Will, Not the Skill, "You play to win the game". Anything that distracts you from that is a detriment to your goal.

My take on trash talk is that it starts at the playground level. Kids emulate their role models - college or pros. When they see them trash talking, they believe that's the way it is supposed to be. Those "BIG BROTHERS", like it or not, are role models.

So what's wrong with a trash talking? My Irish ancestors often had a verbal jab at their brethren and called it "kidding". Sometimes that - "kidding" - got out of hand and a fistfight ensued. The danger is not knowing the sensitivity of the "jabee". Trash talk shows a lack of respect - for yourself as well as for others.

If you doubt my concern about trash talking, I call your attention to the recent football game between Florida International University (FIU) vs. Miami University. That "game" was not what college football was intended to be. An ugly brawl took place in the third quarter when a Miami player caught a pass for a touchdown, then taunted the FIU crowd. His team was penalized15-yards. During the try for point, a Miami player knocked down the FIU place kick holder and appeared to punch him. Benches emptied as more than 100 players joined the fracas on the field. One player removed his helmet and began swinging and hitting opponents. Thirteen players were ejected. When the videotape of the game was reviewed, Miami University officials suspended 12 of its players for one game and one indefinitely. In all, 31 players from both schools were punished.

FIU and Miami coaches and university administrators are embarrassed. They ought to be. They embarrassed the game of college football. Coaches didn't control their players. Trash talking often leads to physical retaliation. However, it doesn't start at the college level. Out-of-control behavior starts on the playground or in school games or little league or at the junior and senior high school level. That's where it needs to be controlled. No, let me correct that - where it needs to be stopped! Coaches and parents have a tougher job today than when I played school games. The influence of that "big brother" is a powerful force. The responsibility to help control trash talk and abhorrent behavior doesn't just lie with big brothers, although more of them need to step up. The responsibility lies with coaches, parents and teachers.

Will you maintain your self-respect as well as respecting others by keeping behavior under control?

Look for my book
It's the Will, Not the Skill
Principles and philosophies of success
For more information about Jim Tunney, go to www.jimtunney.com
Visit my blog for the entire collection of my Tunney Sides:
http://tunney-side-of-the-street.blogspot.com

ARTICLE TAGLINE FOR JIM TUNNEY, Ed.D., CSP, CPAE

Copyright © 2003 Jim Tunney. All rights reserved.
You can visit Jim's website at http://www.jimtunney.com

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